WLIIA? FF 7 and 9 edition
by Angellina Tsaint
Summary: Just something to get me out of writers block... It's funny, really!
1. Hi, I'm Cyria

Disclaimer: WOULD I be wasting my time here if I owned this? But, I own Cyria... ^-^  
  
A blonde girl walks onto the Whose Line Is It Anyway? stage, wearing a black dress. Hi, I'm Cyria, from one of Peaches's unposted stories. I'm going to be hosting a show of Whose Line Is It Anyway -   
Her mobile rang. Cyria blushed. Ah, I'll just get that...   
She got out her mobile and started talking. Hi... Yeah, I'm here... WHAT? What do you mean, none of the cast can come?... Oh, you got some other guys? Who?...Sephiroth, uh-huh... Zidane, uh-huh... Cloud, got it... And Kuja? OK, where are they? HELLO? HELL-  
Cyria then noticed a dagger halfway stuck into her mobile. She looked up to see a guy who resembled a monkey, with a guilty grin on his face.  
Did you do this? She asked in a calm voice.  
Yeah, I did.  
Cyria's eyes suddenly glowed bright red and she leapt at him.   
The guy's eyes widened. But I'm Zidane!  
She stopped her leap in mid-air. Oh. Well, where are the others?  
Zidane pointed to the seats, where Cloud was polishing his sword, and Sephiroth and Kuja were discussing gory ways to kill people.  
Cyria said, The show is about to start!  
It already has, Miss Cyria! The cameraman, Vivi, said.  
Uh... Hi, I'm Cyria-  
WE ALREADY $&%(%^$ KNOW ALL THAT YOU %&$*#%^$@ IDIOT! A random guy in the crowd yelled out.  
Cyria calmly pulled the dagger out of her moblie and threw it at the guy, who died instantly.  
The rest of the crowd was silent.  
Cyria purred, You know who these guys are, so I'll be getting right on to the first game, Superheroes, for all four. She silently went to her seat. What should the problem be? She turned to the crowd.  
Mutant Cats!  
Time Warping!  
Killer Chickens!  
Evil Women!  
Cyria looked unamused. Fine, Evil Women. Anyways, Cloud will come on first, then Sephiroth, then Zidane, then Kuja. Now, what should Cloud's superhero name be? She turned to the crowd again.  
Motorbike Man!  
Lord Diaper!  
Evil Woma-  
Lord Diaper sounds good! Cyria said quickly, So Cloud is Lord Diaper, and the world is being threatened by Evil Women. Take it away Cloud!  
Cloud walked midstage, and pretended to turn on a mega TV. Oh, no! He said in an overly cheesy voice, The world is being threatened by evil women! I will have to gather up the other superheroes!  
Sephiroth walked on. Lord Diaper man! I got your call!  
Good timing, Runny Nose Man! Have you seen all these evil women?  
Sephiroth nodded, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. They've taken over half the world!  
Zidane jumped onstage, and Sephiroth turned to him, wiping his nose again. Random Saying Boy, where were you? The world is in danger from evil women!  
Aye, meh hearty! Zidane yelled in a scottish accent, then shook his head. I mean, yes, I know!  
Cloud looked at an invisible watch on his arm. Where's the last superhero?  
Kuja stiffly got out of his chair and walked onstage. I'm here, Lord Diaper!  
Zidane said, grinning, Lollypop Man, I thought you'd never get to bubblegum land!  
Kuja pretended to suck on a lollypop as Sephiroth wiped his nose yet again. Yes, Random Saying Boy, and it's good you all waited! If we fire a giant lollypop at the earth, it will be destroyed, and no more earth or evil women!  
Sephiroth hollered, high-fiving Kuja.  
Zidane looked at Cloud. Lord Diaper, I don't think that's such a good idea! I mean, think of the polar bears!  
Kuja pretended to press a button and Cloud pretened to peer at a computer screen. Uh, the evil women are gone!  
Cyria pressed the buzzer and the four returned to their seats. 0.01 points to everyone but Zidane, who gets 1 point for acting his role out better than the others!  
Zidane grinned while the others glared at him.  
We'll be back after this commercial break! Cyria said to the camera.  
  
  
  
** COMMERCIAL BREAK **  
  
Vivi is in a laundromat, sticking all his clothes into a washing machine. As he's getting his clothes out, he can't reach the hat and climbs in, when Quina walks past and Vivi is stuck in the washing machine.  
Dagger comes in with an armload of clothes (and if you look careully you can see Zidane's shirt amongst it all @_@), opens the washing machine where Vivi is, sticks all the clothes in, and turns it on.   
She sits down on a bench which is conveniently located in the middle of the room, and gets a bottle of Nestea Fire from nowhere.  
As she's about to drink it, Vivi stumbles out of the washing machine, grabs the drink, and gulps it down. He looks normal again.  
Nestea Fire! It's red hot! He said.  
  
  
  
** COMMERCIAL BREAK FIN **  
  
  
A/N: I KNOW that was short... And crap... But meh, whatcha gonna do?


	2. Questions and Eminem!

Disclaimer: I dun own Eminem!  
  
  
Cyria looked a bit more stable after the commercial break. Heya! Now's time for Questions, where the contestants can only speak... in questions!  
The four were standing on opposite ends of the stage, ready.  
Kuja and Sephiroth walked down.  
Aren't you the guy who destroyed Terra? Sephiroth asked.  
Aren't YOU the guy who destroyed Nibelheim? Kuja replied casually.  
Zidane and Cloud were none too pleased about the topic of choice.  
Sephiroth grinned. What if I am?  
Could I please congratulate you?  
What's in it for me?  
Why should I tell you?  
Why not?  
  
Cyria pressed the buzzer and Kuja walked off, Cloud walked on.  
Cloud, is that really you?  
Do I have to tell you?  
What do you think?  
Should I?  
Didn't you just ask me that question?  
Are you sure?  
  
BZZZT.  
On came Zidane.  
How are you, Zidane?  
How do you think?  
  
What makes you say that?  
Why ask me then?  
Ask you what?  
Ask me... uh...  
BZZZZZT.   
OK, enough of that! Cyria said as they returned to their seats, Now, I'm going to find someone from the audience to come up here for a song!  
She got up and walked up the isle, looking left and right until...  
Hello, miss! What's your name?  
The girl replied.  
Well Ai, why don't you come down here?  
Cyria led Ai - a brown haired girl wearing a Dragonball Z t-shirt and black pants - down to the stage, where she sat on a stool placed there by security.  
This is for Zidane and Cloud, Cyria said, back in her comfy seat, Who will sing to Ai in the style of Eminem.  
Zidane cried.  
Cyria shook her head. No, Eminem the rapper, not M & M the candy!  
  
Anyway, we have sesshoukun on piano and Shasta on guitar!  
The music - which suspiciously sounded like Cleanin' Out My Closet - started.  
Zidane started off, gulping:  
Have you ever met a girl, who wasn't really like a girl at all?  
Ai frowned.  
I have, she's sitting right here, but believe you me, it's a stool not a chair;  
Cloud started his own bit:  
That's who she is, a dbz fan, just like all the rest, another *BZZZT* in a clan, but   
have you ever asked those pretenders who they really are? With her, she'd tell   
ya, straight to your face, while you ignored her and stared out into space!  
Then they both went in for the chorus:  
Ai, oh Ai, why'd you have to try and make me cry? You were a *BZZZT*, you'll  
admit, but when you talk tough, it's only *BZZZT*, Ai, you'll cry, you'll cry when   
you see what your life has made me;  
Needless to say, Ai was getting a tad freaked out by the song.  
Zidane started again:  
Was it a year or just yesterday? When we were kids we could have fun and play,   
but now that's over, don't want it no more, and when we meet in school it's our old  
friendship you ignore, you're with those *BZZZ*ing barbies at school, but face it,  
you're only with them cause you wanna look cool, now Ai, what do you know? Or   
did you forget that too so your popularity would grow?  
And then Cloud:   
The other day I heard the a rumor spread, the kind of *BZZZT* that would turn   
you red, but you ignored it, and now you're not so cool, you're the most unpopular   
kid at school, it's your own *BZZZT*ing fault, not mine, you *BZZZT*, now you'll  
see that your hell is your punishment!  
Ai was now seriously freaked.  
Thankfully, the music stopped.  
Cloud leant down and gave Ai a peck on the cheek. Sorry about the song, we got a bit caught up in it.  
Ah... That's ok! She said and quickly got back to her seat.  
Cyria murmured, If that's how good guys get with Eminem... 100 points to Ai for putting up with that song, and a jumbo bag of M & M's! She chucked a packet to Ai, who was grinning.  
Aaaand 5 points each to Zidane and Cloud, I don't know why, though. Maybe I'm just thankful Sephiroth and Kuja weren't up...  
There was total silence for a few seconds.  
Looks like there's time for one more game... OK, ... aw shit, I forgot what it was called! Well, I'll have it after the break, ciao!  



End file.
